It’s generally accepted that porn is made for men and they’re the only ones that want to watch it and mostly use it to masturbate. That’s at least partially true, but it doesn’t have to be the whole truth about porn. It can be so much more than just a tool for male fantasy. Porn can be a way to improve your sex life. Most women have lots of preconceived notions about it though so it can be a challenge to get your wife/GF/casual hook up to warm to the idea of incorporating porn into sex.
Before you approach her about it you need to pick out a good movie. If you know of a particular fantasy of hers you can cater your pick to it. If not, you should probably go with something that features highly erotic action. You often hear that women need a storyline, but that can be misleading. What women most often enjoy in porn is a strong sense of desire. Watch most porn movies and it’s a purely physical thing with the guy finding new ways to thrust into his girl’s mouth, vagina, and anus. Guys are visual creatures and like that. Women tend to need something more, which is why you need a porn movie where the performers imbue the action with wild, passionate, sensual, erotic desire. These movies are harder to come by but there are a number of producers that specialize in them (particularly companies run by women) so do a little research.
Once you’ve found your movie you’re ready to spice up your sex life. Approach your girl in a way that communicates that it’s all about the two of you making things interesting. Insecurity is the a typical response. Am I not enough for you? Why do you need to watch another girl? is frequently heard. That’s expected. If she comes at you with that you need to assure her that you love your sex life but you also want to keep trying new things and that this is something you’re interested in. It’s about finding new ways to explore with her, not about looking at another girl while you have sex with her.
Throughout the experience you need to emphasize your girl. As you both watch you should make sure to touch her, although not in an overtly sexual way at first. Tell her how beautiful and sexy she is over and over. Soon enough she should be secure enough in your lust for her to really cut loose, which is when you’ll see the sexual improvements.
It’s in that cutting loose that you’ll find the biggest differences in your sex life. Once she’s in a mood to be naughty she’ll happily try a new position that she sees on screen. The moans coming from the guy and girl having sex will inspire the both of you to let the dirty talk flow, something that can improve sex immeasurably if you give it a chance.
If the first experience is a good one you can expand and try new movies, to help improve your sex life. That allows for the opportunity to role play. Perhaps if she sees something on screen she’ll be willing to do it in the bedroom (naughty teacher or secretary, etc) and spice things up. Every girl has an inner sexual tigress but most never let it out for a variety of fears and insecurities. The more comfortable you make her the more willing she’ll be to uncork that tigress and take you to sexual heights you’ve never been before. Just remember that it always has to be about her and about making the sex between the two of you better, not about you introducing your weird porn obsession to your relationship.
If you’ve been in a relationship for any extended period of time you know that the sex tends to slow down. It’s a product of familiarity that makes the early lust and boundless desire fade into comfort. Comfort is good in a lot of ways, particularly if you’re building a life together that you value and are perhaps going to start a family. However, if you neglect your sex life you’ll soon find that everything else begins to suffer. Sex is a biological imperative in human beings and if you ignore it you might see your relationship/marriage fall apart or fall victim to cheating. Thankfully there’s sex advice that can help you spice things up.
The overall theme of this sex advice piece will be variety. You’ll find that almost every specific scenario can be traced back to providing variety. If you give the brain something different it will be more engaged. If you schedule a weekly sex session on Saturday nights the brain will get bored and even though the sex will feel good, you’ll both feel unsatisfied. That’s why you need to mix it up.
Changing locations is a simple yet effective way to have better sex. If you’ve settled into a routine of having sex in the bedroom you need to pull it out of there. Join her in the shower one morning and try to have sex there. Make out with her on the couch during a movie and don’t run to the bedroom when it comes time to have sex. Try seducing her as she prepares dinner and get to her before she’s put anything on the stove. If you’re successful, don’t bother going to the bedroom but instead have sex right there on the floor or kitchen counter. With a location change you’ll find sex becomes more interesting. If you’re feeling particularly bold you can take it outside the house. Public places are dangerous but can be thrilling and if you’re careful they can be safe. Making love on the beach is nice if it’s not windy and you have towels to cover up just in case there are visitors. If you have extra money you could spring for a hotel every once in a while.
The urge to get into your comfy clothes when you get home from work (this applies to both men and women, though moreso to women) is powerful and it’s always nice to be in sweatpants and a loose top. However, that’s anathema to sex. First, seeing the same thing or the same style of outfit every single day is mind numbing and it’s pretty hard to make comfort clothes sexy. Either keep the work clothes on (some work clothes can be super sexy) or change into something that turns him on. It doesn’t have to be lingerie and it doesn’t have to be uncomfortable. If you insist on your comfort clothes at least have enough of them that you can work a different look every day.
The ladies can mix things up and impress their man by taking charge. Go ahead and initiate sex with your man if you want it and feel free to demand whatever position you want. He won’t be turned off by it because it will be a different delight to him.
If you want better sex then the best sex advice I can give is to mix it up. Almost anything that breaks you out of your routine will spice things up. If you never get into a routine in the first place that would be great, but it’s pretty hard to avoid.
There’s nothing wrong with spicing things up in the bedroom to have better sex. The key is to feel and act free of any sense of judgment and remember that you want to have fun and there is nothing in the world more fun than good sex. With that, here are ten tips to improve your sex life.
1 Try a blindfold
Take away sight and you automatically enhance the sexual experience. Whoever wears it is in a constant state of anticipation and each new move is a delightful surprise. Will you play with her breasts, kiss her stomach, lick her vagina, kiss her lips, or something else entirely? What she will do with you? The anticipation will add an element to the sex that spices it up beyond belief and makes it more energetic and passionate.
2 Massage her
A sensual massage for your woman will have her dripping with desire, without question. When done in a sexy, sensual manner the massage turns her entire body into an erogenous zone, although areas such as her breasts and butt are bound to provide extra arousal. If her sex drive seems to be down and she’s having a bit of trouble getting all the way there the erotic massage is a perfect way to go.
3 Feel free to give instruction
It doesn’t have to be kinky or dominant to give your partner instructions on how to please you. In fact, it can be hugely arousing and erotic, particularly if you’re doing it in the throes of pleasure as you moan lustily. Give it a shot and see how it takes things to the next level. This will lead to better sex!
4 Dirty talking is amazing
Dirty talk will engage your brain and hers in amazing ways. It will make any stress or distracting thoughts melt away and focus you fully on the sex. Even better, if you try it only every once in a while it will be a truly arousing experience.
5 Lingerie and role playing
If you have a role playing fantasy then share it with her. If you want to see her in lingerie then buy it for her. Guys respond to variety more than women and if she wants to spice it up for you then she’ll happily play a part. Plus, there’s great fun in playing a role for her too.
6 Don’t be afraid to share your fantasies
Just because you’re sharing your fantasies doesn’t mean they need to be acted out, in case you’re worrying she’s going to be freaked out. The point is to share your sexual desires with her to open the lines of communication and to let her know what drives you wild sexually. Best case scenario is she makes the fantasy come true. Worst case is she works some element of it into future sexual play.
7 Try a game
Sexual card games aren’t just for college kids. Try a game of strip poker or war. Whoever wins gets to pick the sexual act they want performed on them. Try it all night long for a truly transcendent experience.
8 Cock rings can be fun
A cock ring serves the function of keeping your penis harder by restricting the flow of blood out of the shaft. It makes it look a little bigger and it feels better for both of you. Plus, you’ll feel oddly confident with that super hard shaft.
9 Have thrilling sex in a new place
Sex in public, sex in the woods, or sex anywhere else new is a thrill that will kick start your sex drive like you’ve only imagined. You can judge your willingness to take a risk but the further you push it the more likely it is to be thrilling and energizing.
10 Try new positions
Variety is the spice of life and there are dozens of easy sexual positions you can try. From the Kama Sutra to an endless stream of websites you’ll find recommendations for new positions. Try them all for a truly good time.