People come together in all types of sexual relationships ranging from the uber-romantic to strictly platonic. Sex has been highly regarded through the ages as an important factor in solving many relationship problems. Each type of sexual relationship has its own goals and benefits. The advantages are used to meet the needs of the people who enter the relationships, regardless of the level of romance. While most people think of sex in terms of long term relationships, the appeal of casual sex dating has been gaining momentum year after year. The benefits of casual sex are controversial but no without merit. Keeping a casual sex relationship hot, sexy and beneficial takes just as much work as a romantic relationship. They key is to recognize the potential problems and deal with them head on.
One of the most common problems with any sexual relationship, even casual sex, is frequency. One or both of the partners can be dissatisfied with the frequency of the sexual encounters between them. One may think that casual sex partners would not be concerned with frequency because of the simple and casual core of the relationship. However, it is even more important here. Casual sex partners get together for the ease and convenience of the relationship. There are no strings, which means, no family dinners, no anniversaries or birthdays to remember and above all, no worries. The one thing that is important is sex. Entering into a casual sex relationship means entering in a contract of sorts. This is a problem that could potentially destroy a perfectly good sex buddy relationship. It is imperative to be on the same page in sexual frequency.
In a sex buddy relationship, communication often falls by the wayside. This does both parties a huge disservice. Every human relationship can benefit from open communication and sex buddies are no different. In fact, such a relationship may even benefit more so than others. A sex buddy relationship is dependent upon making time for each other. It’s hard to have sex if you’re not finding a significant amount of time somewhere. Commutation is key to finding the right time and place to be together to pursue this sexual relationship further. This is especially true if the relationship is a secret. Communication is also essential to keeping you both on the same page as far as what is and isn’t acceptable behavior in the relationship. Casual sex can mean vastly different things to different people.
The one worst possible problem that can occur between sex buddies is the dreaded “L- word”. Falling in love with your sex buddy takes the relationship another level. It changes the whole dynamic between the two participants. This is either really good or really bad. Both partners falling in love is far more desirable than only one partner falling in love. If only one person is feeling this way, the relationship is over. It may go on for a while longer, but essentially, it is over. Loving and staying in a relationship with someone who doesn’t return your feelings is always detrimental.
Lack of emotion
While it may sound contradictory, sex buddies cannot be totally devoid of emotion for each other. They must care about each other and have respect for one another. Two people simply using each other is an ugly thing that usually brings one or both of them unhappiness. Being in a mutually respectful relationship, no matter how casual reaps its participants many unexpected rewards. A lack of emotion also leads to a quickly feigning attention and a short lived experience that amounts to nothing more than a glorified one night stand.
There was once a time when casual sex was a big no-no. The age of the roaring twenties brought with it, women who were curious about life and what they could accomplish. They wanted to vote and drive and run businesses and they wanted to be acknowledged for their own accomplishments. Women all over the world began to make strides in the women’s movement and engage in behavior previously unheard of by their gender. The way women looked at sex began to change as well and the casual sex relationship began its journey to mainstream consciousness. Throughout the years, most notably the 60’s and 70’s, casual sex began to become more noticeable and frequent in all walks of life. The hippies of the sixties preached and practiced free love among everyone. Suburban moms and dads had key parties in the seventies where they invited the neighborhood parents over for too many cocktails after which they threw their car keys in a big fishbowl. Each guest then blindly drew a set of keys out of the bowl. Whoever they belonged to would be their sex partner for the night. Things are different today and knowledge is power.